Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
Protip: If you slur the word 'tipsy', you've progressed beyond tipsy.
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
Every time I walk onto campus my Saint Patrick's day scar starts to throb. I'm like a drunken accident prone Harry Potter
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
Love that I’m sending my uber driver a thank you message for taking me home via mcdonalds tonight before I’m messaging my date from tonight! Lol
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
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