So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
I love having a boyfriend. I just ate pancakes with regular syrup and chocolate syrup, I havent shaved my legs in a week, and Im still going to get laid tonight.
fuck. you.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
Looked for my lighter in the console and found more tampons. Seriously. You're like a squirrel prepping for a hard winter. A menstruating squirrel.
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
I AM SMARTER THAN EVERY FUCKBOY WHO HAS EVER SWIPED LEFT ON ME
im so drunk that this cat is mothering me. aggressively
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