fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
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