so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
Randomize
