3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
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