I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
I'll bet she douches with gravy.
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
It's not a walk of shame if you run
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
Randomize
