would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
i will never coherently bang her
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
I pour the whiskey from now on
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