Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
where does the pee come out of this thing
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
Having to grow a landing strip to cover the bruises from pole dancing. Thanks for the birthday present, but next time, maybe just a gift card?
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
Randomize