How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
Sometimes I wish I could peel his face off and use it to take all the money out of his account.
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
So far today I've found 3.5 million dollars in savings. Pretty sure management is gonna start buying me hookers if getting laid has this much payoff
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
He wants another date...I mean he's cute, but I just am not ready to give up my glamorous single-girl lifestyle here.
you mean the one where you drink out of the carton and don't wear pants?
Yeah, and pee with the door open. It's the little things.
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
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