Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
Randomize