So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
I love that my idea of a romantic gesture to you is to send you a picture of my vomit saying "wish you were here". You voluntarily dated me. For six years ish.
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
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