Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina
I'm teaching my cat to play fetch
Yep, it's a friday
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
Randomize
