i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
Over 50% of the drunkest nights I have ever had began with me saying "I'll just drink my dinner" to you.
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
I have feelings that need drinking.
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
the roommate is literally cooking green eggs n ham, and I'm too hungover to see straight. Dr Seuss nightmare.
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
Randomize
