never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
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