why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
If I die it's either cuz I undercooked my burger or because I used questionable cheese. I have no pants on, so if there's a wellness check, you go in first.
The moment when you and your BFF compare frequently used emojis and realize you have similar mental disorders and a really weak alibi.
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
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