brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
You told her to step on the scale because you had whiskey goggles, and scales don't lie.
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
Some clips from last night: grinded like I haven't since college. Took shots with a bartender with a bad ass mustache. Made up a string of lies with fake names and occupations. Slept behind the couch with pizza in my hand
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
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