You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
I've realized that my life is a cycle of high that is only broken by sobering up at work, which only happens because I can't smoke more
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
Randomize
