then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
I walked in on you eating olive oil off of a plate. you gave me this look and I just started crying. we were that drunk.
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
Randomize
