I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Randomize
