it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
My early Valentine's Day one night stand just took an uber home. Thank you, technology, for letting me enjoy this day in peace. 😍
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
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