I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
Randomize
