good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
on the brightside, the semester can only get better from getting a dui at 8 am on the first day.
your optimism is becoming unhealthy
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
Randomize
