problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
Randomize
