Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
I literally just biked home like I was on the last leg about to win the tour du France. Fuck diarrhea
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
