Well douche your snatch and let's go!
I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
I just remembered that last night when we tried to walk off the spins you said "pretend i'm your pet dinosaur" so i walked you around on an invisible leash while you made t-rex hissing noises.
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
I've never seen the starbucks guy more terrified than when you dove out the car window after your credit card
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
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