My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
Seriously? Do you have me saved in your phone as 'check every 3 months to see if she's single yet'?
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
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