I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
i just caught my roommate coming out of the bathroom half naked with a surge protector. he told me he didn't wanna talk about it.
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
I just forgot I was standing up.
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
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