dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
I’m drunk and naked and looking for my charger - title of my autobiography.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
Randomize
