I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
The only way i can get arrested is public drunkenness or defacing a national monument. Trust me, i have already looked it up.
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
Randomize
