Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
Randomize
