cannot fit in my clothes. too depressed to drink.
if you drink enough to puke, it's like a weight loss plan.
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
I won't apologize to a one balled man
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
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