i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
Randomize
