C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
Tomorrow, if I don't look at least 5% better than I do on a regular day to day basis, I want you to hit me and tell me that no one will ever love me if I continue to look like I just rolled out of a cocaine induced hibernation. I'm asking you for tough love.
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
It takes a special kind of Adderall to make me go to the hardware store, buy paint, and paint tiny polka-dots on all four of my bedroom walls.
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
Randomize