If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
Randomize
