I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
I might have snap chatted him. So here's what I need you to do. Find him. Abduct him. Get his phone. View the chat so he can't. Then, buy him ice cream. He deserves ice cream.
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
Randomize
