I can't breathe out the right side of my face
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
Went home with a guy 2 " his house". Woke up this morn on couch to parents cooking breakfast, piss all over my back and he is no where to be found. That fuckr pissed on me and bounced. His parents are gonna think some drunk bitch pissed their couch.
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
you spent 5 minutes trying to open an empty PBR and kept saying "don't worry i'll get it i've been working out"
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
Randomize
