can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
Randomize
