ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
Randomize
