I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
I think the neighbors upstairs are trying for more kids. I want to run up there and yell "mazal tov!"
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
Randomize
