you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
Memo to the bitch sitting across from me at Swamp: no one thinks you're classy with your Louis Vuitton and your Burberry scarf when you're dragging on that cig like it was the last cock on earth and you needed cum for sustenance.
I swear to God, I saw my life flash between my legs.
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
Randomize