Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
Randomize
