Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
Randomize
