i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
shotgunning a bud heavy is like shotgunning a turkey sandwich
i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
when I woke up the last searched thing on my phone was "how to make a fireproof dress" I need to stop drinking.
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
the dj asked me quote "are you sure you're sober enough to do this?" And I grabbed the mic from him and said "ill fucking show you sober- HIT IT". I also dropped the mic at the end so he had to come around and pick it up
Shania Twain would have been proud
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
Randomize
