we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
Randomize
