i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
I successfully navigated a full, lengthy interaction with my dad in which he never asked me if I was freshly baked. 10 points.
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
Randomize
