love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
I wish I had my own personal Asian lady that lived under my bed so that she could wax my eyebrows and give me a pedicure whenever I wanted.
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Randomize
