Omg I just drooled on the screen of my phone from smiling with my mouth open while textin bahahahaahah
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
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