stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
You drunk-dialed me and asked me to describe my burrito
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
Randomize
