Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
Randomize