I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
She found my wedding ring, sallowed it and wished me good luck explaining it to my wife before walking out. Now what?
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
Randomize
