Bisexual people are plain selfish.
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
I found a body half wedged into my bedroom wall this morning. How do I explain THIS to the carpenters?
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
Kids I used to babysit are now fuckable members of my social media periphery.. Getting old sucks
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
